Dear Reader,
Life’s most profound transformations often begin with a quiet whisper, an unshakeable feeling that nudges us toward a new path. For me, this whisper grew into a resonant call, guiding me away from a seemingly established career in design and toward the deeply human realm of psychotherapy and counselling. This wasn’t a sudden leap but a gradual unfolding, a journey of self-discovery marked by moments of doubt, courage, and ultimately, profound healing. Join me as I share the story of shedding old skins, embracing the unknown, and finding my true calling in helping others navigate their own complex inner worlds.
Turning the Page: Embracing New Chapters, Self-Discovery, and the Unfolding Path
Closing one chapter to begin writing another is always a multidimensional experience. The emotions and thoughts swirling within me often feel like waves, rising and falling in a continuous cycle. It’s a complex blend of nostalgia for what’s ending, excitement for what’s new, and the ever-present hum of uncertainty about the path ahead.
I reached the culmination of my design degree in late 2021 and officially graduated from Western Sydney University in 2022. Despite the adversities and hardships life threw my way, I persevered. Graduation truly is a bittersweet and blissful moment; it’s when you realize all the time and effort you invested was undeniably worth it. The sense of accomplishment was profound, a testament to resilience forged through challenge.
Yet, even with this profound sense of accomplishment and resilience, a lingering feeling of unease persisted. This sensation had been festering beneath the layers of complex emotions since the very early days of my undergraduate design degree. It almost felt as though I wasn’t satisfied with my achievements; I still had a desire to prove myself, not just to me, but to everyone around me. I wanted more. Perhaps its roots were attached to the doubt planted by naysayers during childhood and my educational years. I was determined to get to the bottom of it, no matter the cost.
The Courageous Leap from Design to Psychotherapy
As I celebrated my significant milestone, this deeper calling began to emerge. While I found creativity and problem-solving in design to be significant for self-expression, there was a growing pull towards understanding the human mind, healing, and supporting well-being on a more profound level. This was an area of interest I always possessed, dating back to high school Year 11 and 12, where I chose Society & Culture as one of my subjects. It was my second favorite, close after Visual Arts. So, it was only natural that this wasn’t an overnight decision; rather, it was a slow dawning, marked by countless late-night reflections and heartfelt conversations.
Among these clear signs was a distinct conversation I had with one of my design educators who had a keen eye for looking beyond the obvious. She possessed an innate ability to sift through details and find the core areas that needed more time to grow and develop. She embodied a calm, gentle, and respectful energy that synchronized throughout every aspect of our classes. We felt it through each other and our work. As such, I also felt very comfortable and safe to accept any constructive criticism I received. I was open to learning, and I enjoyed each lesson.
We had this conversation after class, about my schooling history and how it led me to design. As we spoke, my educator noticed something profound about my character and reflected this to me. She shared that I needed to look into a postgraduate degree in art therapy, as it seamlessly blended my creative and humanistic passions. I knew this was not a coincidence or a flippant piece of unsolicited advice, but a clear sign to look deeper. It was here where I started to notice that the most rewarding aspects of my interactions, even within my creative practice, were often related to understanding people’s needs and emotional responses. This subtle shift in focus eventually led to an “aha!” moment: a clear recognition that my true passion lay in the field of mental health. I also knew there was no need for me to abandon or deny my creativity, but an opportunity to build something for myself that encompassed all of who I was and who I was going to be.
Making the courageous decision to pursue a master’s degree in Psychotherapy and Counselling felt like a seismic shift. The initial fears were palpable – leaving a familiar field, facing a demanding new academic journey, and navigating the financial implications. There was a strong current of self-doubt: Could I truly make this transition? Am I equipped for such a profound and sensitive profession? Overcoming these hesitations involved a deliberate act of trusting my intuition and reminding myself of the underlying drive to contribute meaningfully to others’ lives.
The Catharsis of Self-Discovery and Healing
Since starting this new phase within my life which started in March 2022, I’ve truly learned the meaning of self-discovery and reflection. This process has been a catharsis – a purging of the inauthentic masks we often feel forced to wear throughout life. It’s a stripping away of expectations, societal pressures, and ingrained beliefs that no longer serve us. This wasn’t easy; it often felt like shedding layers of old skin, revealing vulnerabilities I once tried desperately to hide. There were moments of discomfort, even pain, as I confronted limiting beliefs and past experiences.
This process also felt like a cycle of life and death where rebirth and renewal were at the center of this journey. It reawakened a long-lost aspect of my childhood. Growing up, I always felt this deep connection to reptiles, especially serpents. They had become an icon and obsession for me; they were something tangible for me to understand who I was. This connection to natural cycles of shedding and renewal mirrors the very process of catharsis I now experience. I noticed that I always had an affinity for this process, and it manifested itself in every aspect of life. I had no problem letting go of someone or something that no longer served me. It was a protective quality that enabled me to mitigate any pain, anguish, or resentment I had for anyone or anything.
For example, if I didn’t have any friends to play with me at recess or lunchtime, I always had my own methods of self-soothing and play/creative activities to engage myself. If a teacher made a flippant, offensive, or racially/culturally insensitive comment, I always had something to say in response and was always prepared to face the consequences. Even if it meant I had to sit against “The Wall” (the side of the main teacher’s rooms/school office opposite the main courtyard) exposed in front of other students looking on in the playground during lunchtime. Unfortunately, as a child, I just didn’t have the self-awareness to see at that time that this innate skill or coping mechanism was something to cherish and foster, not something to feel shameful or guilty for. It was making me strong, resilient, resourceful, and self-reliant. I was embracing my authentic self, in opposition to the powers that stood around me.
Over time, the liberation that followed each breakthrough was immense. I engaged in practices like journaling, which became a crucial tool for processing emotions and uncovering hidden insights. Mindfulness and self-compassion exercises helped me to sit with difficult feelings rather than resist them, allowing for a deeper understanding of my inner landscape. By immersing myself in these new discoveries, I learned that these therapeutic practices not only expanded but enhanced my creative practice and repertoire of skills. They mirrored the art-making process immensely. Simple daily activities such as my morning and nighttime routines morphed into aspects of my self-care rituals. It showed me that I have value, and I deserve all the time, effort, and attention that I invest in myself.
This journey has been an opportunity to release burdens from my mind, heart, and body, creating space for authenticity. Through vulnerability, I’ve found profound self-acceptance and appreciation. Learning to undo past damage and heal, brick by brick, has been a truly life-changing experience, reshaping my perspective on my own story and my capacity for growth. It’s an ongoing journey, but one that yields immense peace and clarity.
Embracing the Unknown: A Journey of Growth
As I embarked on this journey, I tried to remind myself to never fear change, but rather to welcome progress and grow from it. Trust me, it’s incredibly challenging; I’ve learned this the hard way. Initially, the unknown felt like a vast, dark ocean, and the feelings of uncertainty were a constant companion. There were moments when I desperately craved a roadmap, a clear trajectory for what lay ahead.
In life, most of us like to have a sense of control over our destiny; we want to be the real mastermind working behind all the smoke and mirrors, operating from within the shadows and embrace of a protective curtain. So, the thought of having no control over what is in front of us or what is to come before us makes us panic. Our hearts race and our palms get sweaty thinking about every possibility and every outcome. The discomfort is unbearable at times; it can often be very painful. For me, it manifested as a pit in my throat or stomach; it ached, gnawed at me. I writhed in discomfort and resorted to keeping myself preoccupied with tasks and activities that I unconsciously and subconsciously thought were going to make a world of difference. Maybe some of it does, and that is okay. Again, that is a coping and soothing mechanism that is a protective quality in itself.
However, the unknown and uncertainty require a different kind of mindset. You have to be someone prepared to sit in stillness and submission. You have to be that person who can accept that you are not going to know where the journey is going to take you. Ultimately, you have to learn how to become the individual who is comfortable in letting go. I was first exposed to this when I was a participant in Experiential Group Therapy, where somatic and grounding exercises were foundational parts of the process. I started to take these new skills outside of the therapy space, and they became part of my own personal daily routines.
So, as I navigated this, I had to learn how to confront the unknown and become familiar with the feelings around uncertainty. My strategy involved focusing on what I could control in the present moment: dedicating myself to my studies, passions, or hobbies, building connections with peers, rekindling old or nurturing new friendships, discovering my family’s rich culture, and seeking guidance from mentors or select individuals I trusted. I focused on finding my equals and immersing myself in my local community. I learned to approach daunting future goals by breaking them down into smaller, manageable steps; in a way, reminding myself that it’s okay to always think and approach things practically. I also committed myself to celebrating each small achievement along the way, either with myself or in the company of those that cared. Trying these things helped to quiet the anxieties about the vastness of the journey.
Just like the serpents that I was enamored by as a child, I rediscovered that child I used to be, or the aspects of that version of myself that I had lost along the way. I also realized that as I was evolving and transitioning into this renewed version of myself, some of the relationships and people in my life were not serving me as best as they should. I noticed what was toxic and unhealthy for me. You begin to take the process of catharsis and purging of self into all aspects of your life.
The unexpected benefit of embracing uncertainty has been a significant boost in resilience and adaptability. When you’re no longer clinging to rigid expectations, you become more flexible and open to new possibilities. It fosters a mindset of curiosity rather than fear, allowing for creative problem-solving and an increased capacity to pivot when life takes an unexpected turn. Being prepared to greet the new and bid farewell to the old is truly inevitable, and I’ve come to see that it’s in this constant flux that genuine personal evolution occurs. The unknown is no longer a threat, but a fertile ground for growth.
Sincerely,
Omid Ebrahimi
P.S. Just as a serpent sheds its skin for renewed life, every challenge and uncertainty are an invitation to shed old layers and courageously turn the page. Your most authentic chapter is always waiting for your pen.
Omid Therapeutic Services 